Are you being self? Or are you busy being somebody?
Have you truly shared yourself and truth with others?
Standing up and declaring – “this is me” – can be scary,
But how else can we get to live true to self?
– “Challenge yourself, and believe!” –
I have spent 50 years describing myself as “my father’s daughter”. To me it was obvious.
I look like his mother. I have his calves, his little finger, his skin type. Even my grey hairs are slow to come – like they were for him. As a child, I worked in the garden beside him. As a teenager, I followed in his footsteps to a career in engineering. So, in my head it was ‘obvious’ – I am my father’s daughter.
But then my dear old Dad died, and it caused me to stop and reflect – who am I now?
I have come to believe that we use labels to give ourselves structure and also as a point of reference, a way to make a connection to others. I have a girlfriend who does this to the extreme. When she is introducing me to someone she might say – “This is my friend Christine. She is from New Zealand. She did her post-graduate degree in a remarkable 12 months. She is an engineer. She works on aviation projects etc etc etc.” The introduction could go on for 5-6 minutes, by which time I am deeply embarrassed and the person she is ‘selling’ me to is quite confused. For me, it is an extreme case of TMI.
Why do others need this information? Why is it not enough to be “me”?
Is it because we get lost and uncomfortable, disorientated perhaps, if we cannot ‘place’ someone? Do we need to understand where they sit, or how they stand in comparison to self?
My ego has no demand for gratification, to be acknowledged for what I have achieved. I know and that is enough – for me. I figure if someone wants to put the time and effort in to get to know me, they hopefully will want to find out what sort of person I am, what my values are, my dreams and my passions – not so much what I have achieved – but more about how I have gone about life.
I don’t need a list of my activities to prove that I am worthy of someone else’s attention.
I have spent a lot of time since my Dad’s departure thinking about this question of “who am I?” and linking it in my head to the tussle between ego and soul.
Ego fearing judgement, needing to validate self. Perhaps using association to value self? My father is a good man, I am my father’s daughter, so I am a good person? Is this true? Is this how it started? Hmmm it made me ponder. Is this how I still feel?
Soul – well soul is actually patiently waiting for a breath to be taken and fear of judgement to subside, waiting for the ego to let go.
I was giving a talk at a Mojo Journey’s Retreat this weekend and my subject was based on my book “Liberating Self” and I stood to introduce myself. I said “Hello – I am Christine.”
I am Christine.
I am me.
Enough as and of self.
I knew then that I had stepped into my space and light –acknowledged and liberated self.
So, I wonder – Are you being ‘self’ today?
Believe! Accept. Breathe.
Liberating Self – A Soul’s Journey, explores the path of liberating self to choose to live our dreams and the wonderment that can occur when the soul’s courage is embraced.
To be further inspired, download the entire ebook from my website “Liberating Self – A Soul’s Journey”
Thanks for being curious to connect and be inspired.
Ps Check out my website and philosophy on www.christinespring.com